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There's a lot of weird shit going on here, as you have no doubt noticed. To help you through this seemingly endless maze of random craziness, we kindly souls at TwistedEdge has assembled a list of all the symbols etc used throughout Death By Cinema. The content symbols... Throughout the many reviews that grow like fungus upon the skin of TwistedEdge, there lies a whole bunch of crazy looking symbols. These symbols are in place to let you know what type of things to expect, should you ever have the severe misfortune of having to watch one of these movies... |
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Bad acting. |  |
Badass kung fu. |  |
Big, scary monsters. |
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Crazily inept super-villains. |  |
Childish, cuddly crap. |  |
Embarassing-looking sci-fi. |
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Fashion suicide. |  |
Freaky shit. |  |
Homo-erotic sleaze. |
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Macho bullshit. |  |
Morons. |  |
Rodney Dangerfield. |
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Satan-worshipping nonsense. |  |
Shameful special effects. |  |
Shameless tit flashing. |
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Unconvincing ass-kicking. |  |
Violent death. |  |
Vomitous, kissy crap. |
The rating system... |
Each movie we name and shame in this museum of monstrosities carries a Cheesiness Rating. Cheesiness basically refers to how unintentionally hilarious the movie is - we're talking about those cinematic gems so bad they're actually good. (You know, in a slightly camp, geeky kinda way...) Most cinema review sites use stars to rate their movies. We don't, because we're special. Instead, we use bottles of Jack Daniels - the idea being the number of bottles of Jack the unsuspecting viewer would need to consume in order to make the pain go away. The maximum rating is 10 bottles - a feat reserved for the very worst coma-enducing bouts of shittyness ever to insult the human eye. |
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Above: an example of our unique scoring system. 0 bottles means the movie isn't cheesy at all (you won't find any of those.) 5 bottles? May cause blindness. 10 bottles? The cinematic equivalent of a nuclear war in terms of its devastating effect on mankind. |
Click here to go back to Death By Cinema. |
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